Last weekend I had the opportunity to speak to a group of teen girls. I was nervous, anxious leading up to it because I had been asked to speak on a topic I’ve never done before ~ Self Worth. I even told the organizer that I may not be right for this. I mainly talk on leadership, not self-worth. She convinced me to take a crack at it. I put off working on it, convinced I had nothing to say.
Well….I did it. I ended up talking about how the subconscious mind creates your self-talk strengthens your sense of self-worth. What you feed the subconscious mind determines if this cycle focuses on the positive or negative. I thought them the Jedi mind trick for creating a positive cycle rather than a negative one. If I can toot my own horn, I rocked it! It was great. It felt great and the girls engaged and absorbed the message.
This weekend I had a big realization about that talk. I set out to FINALLY clean up our newly developing forest…I mean flower beds (yes there really are flowers there). It’s something I obviously haven’t done in quite some time (thank God no HOA here). One of the things I like about working in the yard is that it leaves me alone with my thoughts.
The flower beds used to be so pretty. I tended to them and they always made me smile when I got home and I would enjoy walking around to see what was blooming. It put me in a positive state of mind. But then things got busy. I wasn’t tending to them as often and made excuses “I’ll get to that on the weekend”. Weekend came and went. Then it got to the point of “holy shit it’s so out of hand! I can’t deal with this by myself.”
That’s when it hit me, I needed that talk on self-worth just as much as the girls did. Not only was this negative cycle happening outside my house, it was happening inside my head. It started very slowly at first but the last couple of weeks, it’s been in overdrive. It’s a self-confidence crisis here. To the point where I questioned out load if I weren’t getting signs from the universe that this isn’t for me. For the first time, my husband said “well maybe…” That knocked me for a loop.
We talked about it. I stepped back and examined is that really what’s I’m being shown? And when I took the time to think about things objectively, I could see all of the positive things that had been happening.
You can’t just ‘Grow Where You’re Planted’. You have to tend the garden. You’ve got to feed the subconscious mind positive thoughts, what you want to have happen so that it can direct your self-talk into positive statements which builds your self-worth. You have to tend the garden by being aware when you see those weeds (negative thoughts), you yank them out and plant beautiful flowers in their place so there’s no room for the weeds.